Fairer Sex

• NAME : Not known

• AGE : Between 25 to 35

• LOCATION : V9 Bus

• GENDER : Male (XY chromosome)

• ETHNICITY : Probably North Indian

CONTEXT : I got a call from work while I was hanging on to an almost unreachable handhold in the middle of the bus. My TL who is also a species of the XX Chromosome wanted to discuss about the progress of my SSL implementation in WPS 8.5 server. It was supposed to be a fresh installation. [For all the non-techie people I apologize profusely]. Hearing me talk over the phone a not so bad looking guy appreciatively looks at me and the following conversation happens. 

XY : You're the first person of the fairer sex that I've heard talking about LDAP and SSL.

Me : That seems unlikely. There are lots of women in the profession.

XY :  You are probably aware of it because you are somehow related to technology or aware of it. Let alone women, I doubt if most men care about websites with SSL and make payment with credit cards . It is surprising to find a woman who knows and talk about it with so much confidence.

Me (I got one of my crazy thoughts which I just said out loud) : "Fairer Sex". I wonder why this term was coined ? Is it for the colour of the skin of the general XX chromosomes. (Seems unlikely and frankly biased). Perhaps it is because of the judgement capability of majority of the XX chromosomes species. 

XY : I really don't know or care why the term 'fairer sex' was coined. I just find it that sounds better than calling someone 'female' - that's just rude.

Me (I felt that he was trying to be nice but that answer "slightly" rubbed me the wrong way) : Why is it assumed that more men will know about SSL and women wont ? Why is calling someone 'female' rude? Is calling someone 'male' rude ? Why is 'BE LIKE A MAN' a positive advice ? And simultaneously 'YOU ARE BEING SUCH A WOMAN' is always perceived in the derogatory sense? 

XY : I don't know and frankly I don't care to comment on why certain things are generally acceptable in society and others aren't. Maybe you should take it up for your next doctoral thesis. 

Me : Tell me what do you do care about ? Leaving your seat for a woman or the elderly is also generally acceptable in society and infact considered commendable.Never seen you caring about that either.  


After this conversation it was obviously not prudent to ask him if I could take a picture.

But every step of the way I am amazed as to how derogatory comments about women are ingrained in our society. 

Also this apparently is the reason why I will be single for the rest of eternity. Because even when a guy is trying to make conversation with me I find things such as this(read Kolkata is full of sexist "male") and turn off like 1990 Kolkata electricity supply.